Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Arby's - I Don't Shit Like This

As I drove past an Arby's tonight, I thought to myself what sequence of events would have to occur to drive me to eat at Arby's. An hour and a half later and I'm still trying to figure it out. Even the promise of a free roast burger doesn't make me wish to go.

This got me to thinking, what is the worst fast food restaurant around. I think Arby's is the only one in these parts that I absolutely postitively won't patron. Do people feel the same way about Hardee's or Burger King? Taco Bell can be pretty wretched, I don't have fond memories of Boston Market but their cornbread is pretty good. Fazoli's sure doesn't do much for me, but I do like their breadsticks. Maybe some, like my wife, really hate Long John Silver's, but I consider it a guilty pleasure. The best I can come up with is Church's which makes the least edible fried chicken ever, I've never known chicken that doesn't surrender to the tooth. But, I think if I had to choose between felating Biz Markie or eating Church's, I think I could choke down some Church's.

Given the same choice with Arby's, I think I would be choking down Mr Markie's meat.


KC Sponge said...

nothing - and I mean nothing - you can get at any fast food restaurant will ever rival Church's honey butter biscuits, fresh and drippy with adequate glaze.

And that's only because Brown's chicken and their unforgettably perfect corn fritters have been gone for so long.

Chimpotle said...

I will personally hunt down any one who talks shit on Hardee's in the comment section of this post.

Owen said...

The worst and I mean WORST fast food I've ever had was a Jack in the Box breakfast sandwich.

Mar said...

Taco Hell--had a bad experience w/ a bean burrito and nacho supreme in 2004, haven't gone back.

Hardee's-got sick from a ham n cheese in JH. the only way I'd go there afterwards was b/c it was the only fast food open after 1am in college... mmm mmm, curly fries and chicken stars.

truth be told, I think fast food will kill most americans (except that one guy on "supersize me" that eats McD 2x/day and is biologically healthy) and only eat Wendy's when hungover in a bad way. . so 2x a year. I may not be the norm and you won't want to include me in the study.

btw, I don't see why peanut oil makes chik-fil-a sooooo good. it tastes like any other chicken nugget to me.

a beer sort of girl said...

Chik-fil-a isn't just about the peanut oil. It's the pickle juice!

Arby's sometimes has awesome curly fries. That's it, that's all. I know some dudes who love the yellow, fake, nacko-looking cheez sauce there. Makes me sick to think about. But curly fries, oh yeah.

I could totally hate on Hardee's. But I think you could find me fairly easily, so I'll keep it to myself for now.

Bill said...

The Marketfresh sandwiches at Arby's are my weakness. The curly fries are good but they aren't as good as Backyard Burger's.

When I was a kid, I loved the Arby's roast beef sandwiches as well as the Hardee's (do they even offer it anymore?)

As for Brown's, I can still see their building whenever I drive past Sterling and 40 Hwy even though it's been a gas station for 20+ years

Church's biscuits, yes moar plz nom nom nom. Although I used to prefer Popeye's before they went and jacked up the recipe in the mid 90s

What I don't do though is McDonald's. Nasty, nasty, unhealthy stuff. That and their marketing campaigns are brilliant as my 7 year old only wants, but rarely gets, them if we're having a fast food supper.

Donna said...

The only fast food we ever get is McDonald's $1 cheeseburger. No, it isn't good. But it's cheap.

If it weren't for getting fatter than I already am, I'd eat KFC original recipe every day of my life. Because I love grease.

JJSKCK said...

I like Arby's. No real explanation, other than the fact that I think I like all fast food. I'll admit it's strange to crave "cuisine" at times and "crap" at others, but them's the breaks.

The worst fast food burger used to be Hardee's (pre-Carl's Jr.). It wasn't friggin' close. When I was a kid we went to the one at 63rd and Parallel because they had cheap burgers, but christ were they horrid. The buns were stale and the meat was gristle soaked in water.

Now, of course, they have good burgers. My conundrum with Hardee's is that they're certainly better than McDonald's, but not as good as, say Big Bam's or Grandstand. It's like they're lost in the middle in terms of price AND quality, which puts them in a strange niche.

The DLC said...

Ahhh, Arby's. They had the giant cowboy hat signs, horsey sauce and curly fries before they were ubiquitous.

That was before the oven mitt.

These days it's pretty much off my radar, but not because it tastes terrible, but because it's lame.

Anonymous said...

I typically avoid fast food altogether, but I NEVER go to Subway after I went there ONCE 16 years ago. The meat and cheese was so thin that it was pathetic. Supposedly it's even thinner now!

How do they stay in business?

Olentangy said...

Grossest Fast Food places

1. Jack in the Box
2. Taco Bell
3. KFC
4. Burger King
5. A&W
6. McDonald's

Lame but not gross
7. Subway
8. Taco Bueno/Johns
9. Chick Fil A

Decent Fast Food places
in no order

Jimmy Johns