Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Death by Food: The Gaf's Irish Gut Bomb

Death by Food is a running list of the top ten edible items in Kansas City that may possibly kill you during consumption. The higher the rating, the more likely you should throw caution to the wind.

Back in early February, Bull E. Vard watched an episode of No Reservations and got a hard on for a sandwich in Chicago called the Three Little Pigs. Aaron from BBQ Addicts was kind enough to point him towards a sandwich of possible equal magnitude right here in KC at the Gaf. Here is the menu exert for the Irish Gut Bomb:
A HUGE hand breaded pork tenderloin topped with onion rings, smoked bacon, cheddar, lettuce, tomato, red onion, 2 fried eggs, & Jameson BBQ Sauce
Sounds delicious. Despite a near egjaculation experience at ChefBurger, I was graciously invited to share in this journey of over-consumption and indigestion. The challenge we were met with looked something like this...

I took the top down for this photo, and since it may be hard to determine, the anatomy from bottom up is tenderloin, egg, cheese, bacon, onion ring. The first mistake in eating this was likely not ordering a beer to go with it. I also have to question the use of both onion rings and red onion. But what really killed this sandwich for me was the application of barbecue sauce.

Barbecue sauce in and of itself is a wonderful thing. I love it when used during cooking or to spice up something that is smoked/grilled yet lacking in flavor. Barbecue sauce used as a condiment like mustard is the quickest way to ruin a sandwich. It just takes the sandwich in a place it wasn't going before.

In honor of St Patrick's Day though, the Gaf's Irish Gut Bomb will assume the number one spot in the top ten KC foods that can kill you. Three fried items (two of them battered) plus cheese and bacon equals out to a true gut bomb. I don't think Bull even ate the second half of his, which could either speak to the sandwich itself or the width of my ass. Probably both.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's hard to tell. Was that the food before you ate it, or after you pooped it?

Tainty McScrotleson said...

I miss the GAF

Girth Bowelturd said...

The shit place that is there now sucks dick